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douchebagjack Ballot for 2026 Week 5

Ballot Type: Human

Submitted: Sept. 29, 2026, 6:03 a.m.

Overall Rationale: i wish they’d throw my poll out until like week 6 tbh. i try to only use this years results. using general conference strength as to which wins are good vs bad. P4 win >> PAC, MWC, American > Sun Belt > MAC, CUSA. FCS wins are worthless to me. i restart each week so this will change 100% next week.

Why should they be ranked? Have they beat a P4 team? Have they lost one game or less? 53 teams have done both, they should make up the whole top 25.

This poll feels factious because it’s 100% results driven. Not a predictor or a talent indicator, purely the most deserving teams.

Rank Team Reason
1 Texas Longhorns Best 3 Wins: Ohio State, Tennessee, Texas State

Texas is still undefeated and has probably the best overall resume in the country, but I don't think they've looked like an unstoppable No. 1. Beating Ohio State and then going into Knoxville and surviving Tennessee is massive, though. The defense is the real star here. Colin Simmons just casually tying a Texas sack record with five sacks against Tennessee is awesome. Arch Manning has been below average and 20 points against Tennessee is a little concerning, but when you're winning road games against ranked SEC teams, a win is a win.
2 Notre Dame Fighting Irish Best 3 Wins: Michigan State, Wisconsin, Purdue

42.2 p/g and 8.2 opp p/g and they've been silently kind of really good? Again, who knows who is really good at this point but, 3 Big Ten wins for Notre Dame. Michigan State is trending up, Wisconsin is majorly trending up after beating Penn State. Purdue is Purdue but more respectable beating than Directional State University on a (extra) last second hail mary. all things considered one of the best resumes in the country.
3 Florida Gators Best 3 Wins: Ole Miss, Auburn, FAU

Alabama continues to do Alabama things. They're 4-0, they've got the Florida State win, and they just absolutely nuked South Carolina 49-18. Keelan Russell has looked good, the offense is averaging nearly 28 points a game, and there really isn't a bad result on the resume. The issue is that Florida State and South Carolina are both more "good win" than "holy shit Alabama beat them." Looking forward to Mississippi State game!
4 Alabama Crimson Tide Best 3 Wins: South Carolina, Kentucky, Florida State

Will the Florida State win be worth anything? Who knows. Will Kentucky or South Carolina wins be worth anything? Who knows. Perfect record + 3 P4 wins, good enough at this point
5 Mississippi State Bulldogs Best 3 Wins: Missouri, South Carolina, Minnesota

Kamario Taylor continues to look really really good. 14-2 TD:INT ratio. 2 SEC wins + OOC B1G Win over Minnesota, who is trending up. Seriously worth considering for most unexpected start. Kan Kamario kontinue kollecting koins & klimbing Kamario's Heisman khances?

And now they get Alabama. Fraud watch / put up or shut up weekend for the cowbells.
6 Miami Hurricanes Best 3 Wins: Wake Forest, Stanford, Central Michigan

Miami has been quietly destroying people. 52-3 against Central Michigan after already beating Wake Forest 33-20, and they're sitting at 4-0 without a particularly scary result on the schedule. That's the problem: I believe Miami is really good, but I don't know if we've learned how good yet. The defense has been nasty, the offense has been efficient, and they haven't really had a "Miami is in trouble" moment.
7 Iowa Hawkeyes Best 3 Wins: Michigan, Iowa State, Northern Illinois

Iowa is 4-0 and just beat Michigan 20-19 at the big house. That sentence alone gets them into the conversation. Is Iowa an elite team? Probably not. Is Iowa exactly the kind of team you absolutely do not want to play in November? Yeah. They don't need to score 40. They don't need to dominate you. They just need to make you miserable for four quarters. Iowa is back!
8 Georgia Bulldogs Best 3 Wins: Oklahoma, Arkansas, Western Kentucky

Georgia has probably been the least controversial team in this entire top 10. They're just really fucking good. 41-13 against Oklahoma and 45-17 against Arkansas, with the defense absolutely suffocating the run game. Oklahoma got 17 rushing yards against them. 17. Gunner Stockton doesn't need to throw for 400 yards when Georgia can just run the ball down your throat and let the defense ruin your afternoon.
9 Indiana Hoosiers Best 3 Wins: Northwestern, North Texas, Western Kentucky

Indiana is 4-0 and the defending national champion, so obviously they're going to be here, but this is probably the most "I don't know" team in this group. They just beat Northwestern 29-23 in a game where they were absolutely not convincing. A six-point win over Northwestern isn't exactly the result you want when you're trying to convince people you're still an elite team. The defense is good, the offense has enough talent, and they're undefeated, but Josh Hoover has not been the star.
10 Utah Utes Best 3 Wins: Iowa State, Arkansas, Utah State

Utah is 4-0 and doing the Utah thing where nobody really knows how good they are because they haven't played anyone truly scary yet. But they're beating the teams they're supposed to beat, the defense looks like a Utah defense, and they're not giving you any reason to drop them. At this point, I'm willing to buy in until someone makes me regret it.
11 Texas Tech Red Raiders Best 3 Wins: Houston, Oregon State, Sam Houston State

Texas Tech is 4-0 and I'm still not entirely sure what to do with them. They look legitimately good, but this is where the rankings start getting very loosy, goosy. The offense has been productive, they're undefeated, and there hasn't been a bad performance yet. Is this a top-10 team? Maybe. Is this a team that could lose to someone completely random in three weeks? Also yes.
12 Pittsburgh Panthers Best 3 Wins: Syracuse, UCF, Miami (OH)

Pitt is undefeated and therefore gets to exist in the "wait, are Pitt actually good?" portion of the rankings. They're putting up enough points and haven't given us a reason to punish them, but the schedule hasn't exactly forced me to make a firm conclusion either. I don't know if Pitt is the 12th-best team in America. I don't know if Pitt is the 25th-best team in America. I do know they're 4-0, so congratulations, you're ranked.
13 Cincinnati Bearcats Best 3 Wins: Kansas State, Boston College, Miami OH

Cincinnati has quietly put together a really nice start and now I'm obligated to take them seriously. They're undefeated, they're playing competent football, and there isn't an obvious reason to have them lower. Could they be a genuinely good team? Absolutely. Could this ranking look completely stupid in three weeks? Also absolutely. The entire 12-18 section is basically me throwing teams into a bucket and seeing what happens.
14 UCLA Bruins Best 3 Wins: Cal, Maryland, Purdue

JMU transfer RB Wayne Knight is off to the best start of maybe all P4 RBs in the country, 445 yards, 9.1 Y/A, 9 TDs. Otherwise, Nico is serviceable and fine at QB. Off to a great start for the new HC and 3 P4 wins. Haven't beat nobody that is a world beater but more respectable beating than Directional State University on a (extra) last second hail mary.
15 Virginia Tech Hokies Best 3 Wins: Maryland, Boston College, Old Dominion

Virginia Tech is undefeated, which is honestly doing a lot of work here. They haven't given me a reason to drop them, but they also haven't given me a reason to put them in the top 10. This is the part of the rankings where we're basically grading "how much do I think this team deserves a good ranking?" and Virginia Tech gets a solid "probably i guess?" for now.
16 BYU Cougars Best 3 Wins: Arizona, Colorado State, Utah Tech

BYU continues to be extremely annoying to rank because they're good enough that you don't want to leave them out, but I'm not convinced they're actually better than most of the teams around them. They're undefeated, the offense has been productive, and the resume is bad. That's basically the entire argument. I could put them 12th. I could put them 20th. Nobody could convince me either choice is obviously wrong.
17 Nebraska Cornhuskers Best 3 Wins: Michigan State, Ohio, Bowling Green

Nebraska is finally giving us something to work with. They're undefeated and have looked much more competent than the Nebraska of recent memory, which admittedly isn't a particularly high bar. The defense has been solid and they're avoiding the kind of stupid losses that have defined this program for approximately one thousand years. Until they beat somebody I'm supposed to care about, though, this is about where I'm comfortable.
18 Duke Blue Devils Best 3 Wins: Illinois, Stanford, Tulane

Duke at 18 feels completely ridiculous and also completely defensible. They're undefeated, they're winning games, and I have to respect that. Is Duke actually the 18th-best team in the country? I have absolutely no fucking idea. But they're 4-0 and some teams ahead of them have already lost, so here we are. This is what happens when the entire middle of the poll is a tire fire.
19 Ohio State Buckeyes Best 3 Wins: Illinois, Ball State, Kent State
Loss: Texas

Ohio State has one of the best losses in the country and that is doing a lot of heavy lifting here. Losing to Texas isn't embarrassing, obviously, but the Buckeyes haven't exactly given us a reason to think they're elite otherwise. This feels like a team that could absolutely rocket back into the top 10 once Big Ten play really gets going, but for now, you can't just give them bonus points for being Ohio State. The Texas game happened. They lost it.
20 Ole Miss Rebels Best 3 Wins: LSU, Louisville, Charlotte
Loss: Florida

Well, that went poorly. Ole Miss came into the Florida game ranked No. 4 and left looking like they had been hit by a truck. Giving up 52 points and getting absolutely demolished in the second half is not ideal. Add to that Louisville lost to Wake Forest. I still think this is a good team, and one bad loss doesn't erase everything they did before it, but going from No. 4 to somewhere around 20 feels completely reasonable after that performance.
21 LSU Tigers Best 3 Wins: Texas A&M, Clemson, LA Tech
Loss: Ole Miss

LSU is another team I'm struggling to get a read on. There's enough talent here to make me think they could eventually be much higher, but the results haven't given me a compelling argument to put them there right now. At 21, I'm basically saying "I think LSU is good, but please show me something." SEC teams get an unusually long leash because eventually someone on their schedule is going to provide the opportunity. TA&M & Clemson are both kinda duds on the schedule, but they dominated.
22 Tulsa Golden Hurricane Best 3 Wins: Oklahoma State, Sam Houston State, East Texas A&M
Loss: Arkansas

Tulsa at 22 is probably the first ranking where people start asking what the hell I'm doing. They beat OK State so for now, until more information, they are above them.
23 Oklahoma State Cowboys Best 3 Wins: Oregon, West Virginia, Murray State
Loss: Tulsa

Oklahoma State beat Oregon and lost to Tulsa. Oregon/WV is a better resume than OKST/SHST, but Tulsa wins on h2h
24 Oregon Ducks Best 3 Wins: USC, Boise State, Portland State
Loss: Oklahoma State

Lost to OKST, can they go up? But better hope the Cowboys keeps winning.
25 Wake Forest Demon Deacons Best 3 Wins: Louisville, Purdue, Akron
Loss: Miami

Wake Forest rounds this thing out because they lost to Miami and beat 2 P4 teams. They're not exactly screaming "College Football Playoff contender," but somebody has to be 25. This is probably the easiest team in the poll to replace if someone outside the rankings actually puts together a convincing win. For now, welcome to the top 25, Wake.

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