Ch-i-ef Ballot for 2026 Week 5
Ballot Type: Human
Submitted: Sept. 28, 2026, 11:41 p.m.
Overall Rationale: Erm
| Rank | Team | Reason |
|---|---|---|
| 1 |
Texas Longhorns
|
Pull a Manning when your time comes, you know what I mean |
| 2 |
Georgia Bulldogs
|
Belt to ass |
| 3 |
Miami Hurricanes
|
OMG hi Malachi Toney! |
| 4 |
Notre Dame Fighting Irish
|
Play someone |
| 5 |
Indiana Hoosiers
|
Hey man can your QB hit open receivers downfield, I'm starting to get worried |
| 6 |
Ohio State Buckeyes
|
OMG hi Jeremiah Smith |
| 7 |
Texas Tech Red Raiders
|
Hey man can your QB not throw it to the other team as muc- Castellanos is on your team??? |
| 8 |
BYU Cougars
|
Praise be the Crumbl |
| 9 |
Alabama Crimson Tide
|
Ehh you're looking like an actual team now, but here comes the gauntlet |
| 10 |
Iowa Hawkeyes
|
No extra time needed |
| 11 |
Florida Gators
|
Wait, are you guys good? |
| 12 |
Utah Utes
|
Top 10 showdown coming to the state of Utah soon? |
| 13 |
Virginia Tech Hokies
|
I think Pitt and Cal are going to be the first real tests for the Hokies, let's see how they handle it |
| 14 |
Oregon Ducks
|
Rest up Dante Moore |
| 15 |
Ole Miss Rebels
|
Trap game + Florida might be good this year |
| 16 |
LSU Tigers
|
Them Aggies goin eight n four eh |
| 17 |
UCLA Bruins
|
Wait, are you guys good? |
| 18 |
Mississippi State Bulldogs
|
Wait, are you guys good? |
| 19 |
Oklahoma State Cowboys
|
Tulsa be something man |
| 20 |
Tennessee Volunteers
|
Schedule isn't as brutal as other SEC teams, too bad you don't get to face OU. |
| 21 |
Duke Blue Devils
|
What did William and Mary Tribe do to you guys? |
| 22 |
Pittsburgh Panthers
|
Every year, Pitt has some of the most awesome ways they lose their first game |
| 23 |
Cincinnati Bearcats
|
8 completed passes and a win? |
| 24 |
USC Trojans
|
... |
| 25 |
North Dakota State Bison
|
Hell yeah |
Teams Ranked:
| Rank | Team | Unusualness |
|---|---|---|
| 1 |
Texas Longhorns
|
0.00 |
| 2 |
Georgia Bulldogs
|
0.00 |
| 3 |
Miami Hurricanes
|
0.00 |
| 4 |
Notre Dame Fighting Irish
|
0.00 |
| 5 |
Indiana Hoosiers
|
0.00 |
| 6 |
Ohio State Buckeyes
|
0.00 |
| 7 |
Texas Tech Red Raiders
|
0.54 |
| 8 |
BYU Cougars
|
0.16 |
| 9 |
Alabama Crimson Tide
|
-0.21 |
| 10 |
Iowa Hawkeyes
|
0.25 |
| 11 |
Florida Gators
|
-0.35 |
| 12 |
Utah Utes
|
0.00 |
| 13 |
Virginia Tech Hokies
|
2.11 |
| 14 |
Oregon Ducks
|
0.00 |
| 15 |
Ole Miss Rebels
|
0.00 |
| 16 |
LSU Tigers
|
0.00 |
| 17 |
UCLA Bruins
|
0.00 |
| 18 |
Mississippi State Bulldogs
|
-0.12 |
| 19 |
Oklahoma State Cowboys
|
0.00 |
| 20 |
Tennessee Volunteers
|
0.00 |
| 21 |
Duke Blue Devils
|
0.00 |
| 22 |
Pittsburgh Panthers
|
0.00 |
| 23 |
Cincinnati Bearcats
|
0.00 |
| 24 |
USC Trojans
|
0.00 |
| 25 |
North Dakota State Bison
|
0.00 |
Nebraska Cornhuskers
Houston Cougars