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Doogitywoogity Ballot for 2026 Week 9

Ballot Type: Human

Submitted: Oct. 27, 2026, 1:11 a.m.

Overall Rationale: Every week I watch my Aggies play football just to piss myself off. To cleanse my palate, I watch lots of other teams who are varying degrees of bad as well. Occasionally a team actually does well? What’s that like? In this age of transfer portal induced thinness that’s all the more rare.

Rank Team Reason
1 Miami Hurricanes Beating up an injured Pitt doesn’t impress me much. Wake is your only real win of the season. These next three matchups are your only “real” matchups otherwise, and two of those are UNC and Duke.
2 Utah Utes I was not complimentary of the Utes last week, but they got a good win over a good UH after pulling away late for their first real win. They’ll have to keep the ball rolling with Cinci, BYU, and AZ coming up.
3 UCLA Bruins UCLA continues their run, the question is, are they just a schedule merchant? Probably. Minnesota, Michigan, and USC look to be their hardest game, and I don’t think more than one of those squads will be ranked at season’s end.
4 Georgia Bulldogs 😴
5 BYU Cougars UCF? Really? Too much bouncing on your bros bed while prepping for the bounce house I guess. ND and AZ are buoying this squad quite a bit.
6 Ohio State Buckeyes 😴
7 Kentucky Wildcats Unchallenged for the top position in the SEC this week. Just like everyone expected.
8 Indiana Hoosiers UGLY win over a middling Michigan squad. I may be overranking them. But if I drop them I need to drop Ohio State who I’m worried I have too low, but I also don’t know how they’ll be with injuries. In short, huh?
9 Notre Dame Fighting Irish 😴
10 Wake Forest Demon Deacons 😴
11 Northwestern Wildcats You beat up Rutgers? You fucking monsters. That doesn’t shift my perception of this squad too much. Oregon, Iowa, Ohio State, Minnesota, Illinois is a hard but not impossible end of the schedule. NW could sneak into the playoffs.
12 Texas Tech Red Raiders Cincinnati dominated yall. Last week was the first time I saw the TTU we were expecting, this week is more like what we’ve seen. In fairness I’ve liked Cincinnati this season despite their troubles. Beat Zona and the Pokes and don’t screw anything else up and you may be able to fight your way in.
13 SMU Mustangs That’s what can happen when you don’t throw multiple picks every game. Play like this and you’re a contender. Let’s see if this new leaf the past couple weeks is legit or if you revert back to the uninspiring play from earlier this season. You’ve fallen ass backwards into only one loss, keep it that way.
14 Arizona Wildcats Dominant win over the clones, now for a season defining game vs TTU. Utah, KState, and ASU should be challenging games for this squad as well down the stretch.
15 LSU Tigers This squad is still raw, still not polished, and that means they can pull some real stinkers. But, Kiffin has got a squad doing well once again, just temper this season’s expectations a bit. They’ve got at least one more inexplicable loss in them, and a tough end to their schedule. They could equally win them all or lose them all and I wouldn’t be shocked either way.
16 Alabama Crimson Tide For three quarters that was far closer than it should have been. I know my Aggies, we are bad. It took Nabou (who I’m just gonna say has been one of the biggest disappointments in his lack of development here) snapping the ball while trying to draw Alabama off sides to flip the tide of the game. Lots of work for the crimson tide going forwards. LSU looms large before some cupcakes and then an upset minded Auburn.
17 Cincinnati Bearcats Huge win for Cinci after some early setbacks. It won’t get easier with Utah and Houston coming up. Bearcats have to prove they’re legit or they’ll fall back out again.
18 Florida Gators 😴
19 Texas Longhorns Big win over Ole Miss despite their best efforts to lose the game. Have you considered continuing playing after scoring 24? It’s an option beyond the 4th quarter. Lots of reasons to find this squad suspect, but they are 5-2 with very confusing results.
20 Ole Miss Rebels Trinidad couldn’t quite make the magic happen, in what felt similar to the end of the Miami game from last year. Ole Miss is gonna have to run house to have a shot, but Georgia is their only big competition left. Off they pull that and don’t fuck up along the way they could sneak back into contention.
21 Oregon State Beavers 😴
22 Wisconsin Badgers Alright I’ll cave. Wiscy has somehow gotten back to a reasonable form. Iowa and Minnesota are the real challenges left, there’s a world where the Badgers sneak into the B1GCG.
23 Virginia Tech Hokies I will admit I know very little about this game, but a win over Clemson to secure fourth in the ACC rn isn’t bad. SMU and Miami are still coming up, and don’t snooze on Stanford this year. I won’t pretend to know who will win the Hokies vs the Hoos, it will probably depend on if it’s a big game for VT or not.
24 New Mexico Lobos Nice win over NDSU! NM is in control of the MW and so long as they don’t choke they’ll be right there in contention with UTSA, JMU, and Boise State for the G6 representative spot. Don’t snooze on the Beavers either, they could make a more compelling case than the Lobos, I’ve got them higher rn if they can keep it together. Keep your eyes on the Boise State - Oregon State game if there aren’t any other further developments on the G6 side.
25 Minnesota Golden Gophers Originally I had Houston ranked in the low 20s, but I’ve since learned of Weigman’s injury. I hope the kid can get healthy in time for the combine. Now onto Minnesota. They have control of 4/5 of their trophies. I’m not sure what happens when Minnesota has control over all 5 but I think it means they’ll threepeat again. They’ve earned a top 25 spot, even with their inexplicable loss to Purdue. Floyd told me to tell you that he says “Row the Boat!”

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