Ballot Type: Human
Submitted: Nov. 29, 2021, 10:46 p.m.
Rank | Team | Reason |
---|---|---|
1 | Georgia Bulldogs | A lock for the playoffs no matter what. Seems like you'll lock in at 1 or 4, win or lose, so it really doesn't matter. |
2 | Michigan Wolverines | The curse has lifted and the Wolverines have finally beaten the Buckeyes. Just gotta close it out against Iowa and you're in the playoffs. Hope the #2 curse of this year doesn't get ya. |
3 | Cincinnati Bearcats | One final opponent, one final ranked opponent. Deep breaths, Bearcats...ALTHOUGH... there could be a scenario where Bama beats Georgia, Michigan wins against Iowa, Oklahoma State wins dominantly against Baylor, you play poorly in a win against Houston, and the Committee just might toss you aside at 5. |
4 | Oklahoma State Cowboys | You finally closed out a a game against the Sooners, and have a strong chance at the playoffs. Just need to win against Baylor and become the biggest Georgia fans this weekend. |
5 | Alabama Crimson Tide | Shutout at half? 4 overtimes to beat a 1 legged backup QB? Georgia next week?...you're gonna pull out all the tricks and stunts, aren't you... |
6 | Notre Dame Fighting Irish | Imagine having a shot (even a minimal one at that) and your HC leaves for...LSU???? AHAHAHAhahahaha...and now Cinci fans are nervously looking the other way. |
7 | Ohio State Buckeyes | Just dominated in the trenches. That defense has had its cracks all season since Oregon first exposed it. Too bad; your offense was probably one of the few offenses to compete with Georgia's elite defense. |
8 | Ole Miss Rebels | The Egg Bowl didn't feature any players imitating a peeing dog. Only a 5/10 imo. |
9 | Baylor Bears | Ultimate sickos game this weekend. Cowboys defense vs Bears defense. Nobody will probably score above 30. |
10 | Oregon Ducks | Rip dreams of a coachless, 7-5 team in Washington State clutching the North. Anyways, Ducks are hungry for revenge against Utah and with their playoff hopes dead. Can they win the rematch and get to the Rose Bowl? |
11 | Michigan State Spartans | You know, I wonder who the Heisman favorite is? None of the QB's between Stroud, Young, and Corral look the complete part. Gotta guess Kenneth Walker still is? |
12 | BYU Cougars | The Pac12 tour is complete. Unfortunately for you, the Utes are going duck hunting and leaving you behind.  |
13 | Utah Utes | Ok, you beat Oregon once. Surely you don't blow it here and completely dash your Rose Bowl chances...right? |
14 | Iowa Hawkeyes | This is the most whelming 10-2 team. I think most people have written you off against Michigan. Well, let's see if the chaos gods favor you. |
15 | Oklahoma Sooners | I've got nothing to say really. Your entire program burned halfway down in 3 days and that fire isn't going away. |
16 | Pittsburgh Panthers | You finally did it Pitt. You didn't choke your season away. Now championship weekend reminas. |
17 | Houston Cougars | Well Houston, you might become the most hated team of the season this weekend depending on the game results. |
18 | Wake Forest Demon Deacons | Well the offense was fun to watch this season! Made a top 10 appearance too! |
19 | San Diego State Aztecs | Ok honestly, just give the Heisman to Matt Araiza, but unironically. This has been the most bland Heisman race in recent years. GIVE IT TO THE ELITE PUNTER. |
20 | NC State Wolfpack | Lol UNC. |
21 | Clemson Tigers | Clemson never truly dies huh... |
22 | Arkansas Razorbacks | Honestly, it's been a great season for you guys. Yessir! |
23 | Texas A&M Aggies | You just choked against an LSU team with their HC halfway out the door.  |
24 | Kentucky Wildcats | Welcome back to the rankings Kentucky, and just in time too! That 3 game losing streak didn't bury your season entirely it looks like. |
25 | Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns | Oh the cruel gods, making me choose between Louisiana and the fallen dream team of UTSA...sorry Roadrunners, I chose Louisiana. |
Teams Ranked:
Rank | Team | Unusualness |
---|---|---|
1 | Georgia Bulldogs | 0.00 |
2 | Michigan Wolverines | 0.00 |
3 | Cincinnati Bearcats | 0.00 |
4 | Oklahoma State Cowboys | 0.00 |
5 | Alabama Crimson Tide | 0.00 |
6 | Notre Dame Fighting Irish | 0.00 |
7 | Ohio State Buckeyes | 0.00 |
8 | Ole Miss Rebels | 0.00 |
9 | Baylor Bears | 0.00 |
10 | Oregon Ducks | 0.00 |
11 | Michigan State Spartans | 0.00 |
12 | BYU Cougars | 0.00 |
13 | Utah Utes | 0.00 |
14 | Iowa Hawkeyes | 0.00 |
15 | Oklahoma Sooners | 0.00 |
16 | Pittsburgh Panthers | 0.00 |
17 | Houston Cougars | 0.00 |
18 | Wake Forest Demon Deacons | 0.00 |
19 | San Diego State Aztecs | 0.00 |
20 | NC State Wolfpack | 0.00 |
21 | Clemson Tigers | 0.00 |
22 | Arkansas Razorbacks | 0.00 |
23 | Texas A&M Aggies | 0.00 |
24 | Kentucky Wildcats | 0.00 |
25 | Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns | -0.40 |
No major omissions.
Total Score: 0.40